Yes at 28 I’m just learning how to WAIT!
When I had my first miscarriage I fought with my patience. Every month I was mentally pregnant. I would be all over the message boards on Glow. I was asking the same questions like every other woman.
Am I pregnant?
Do you see a second line?
I had spotting period or implantation bleeding?
Oh the anxiety of waiting for the two lines to appear again.
This went on for most of 2016 to be transparent. My life was Am I pregnant?
Then it hit me, the more I stress the less likely it will happen. So if I don’t think about having a baby what am I to do?
Wait was the answer. What to do while waiting was the concern.
While waiting I have developed a relationship with God and have invested in myself. This blog is one way. I learned why I should wait. Maybe what I think I’m ready for I am not.
Let me explain.
When I got pregnant, I had nothing for my kids to come into. My fiance was working a job that wasn’t career focused no benefits. I am a nurse and had an okay job. But it was barely feeding us. Financially we had no plan. If you don’t plan you plan to fail. I think about how much stress those 9 months would have brought. Also we were not married yet. One thing I wanted was to be married before having kids. That was a personal choice I made as a little girl. I was a difficult child and knew I needed a commitment to me first.
The most important thing I discovered was I had not been living in my purpose. I have a wonderful purpose that I was able to discover through getting closer to God and taking a self improvement course. My purpose in life is to use my goal oriented nature and entreprenuer skills to encourage and help others. Pretty awesome to me. I have always worked for entreprenuers from my uncles and helping my brother from time to time.
While growing my business I am also helping people start and grow their business. I am helping by building up business consultant clients by helping with their social media and virtual assiting(which turns into everything).
I am happier than I am at my 9-5. I havent officially started taking payments. I am bartering for services. Bartering isnt dead. I need so many things right now that we can help each other.
While waiting on that second line I have learned so much already about myself. While waiting is hard its definitely worth it. As God knows when you are in fact ready for baby.
If he tells you not now. You keep trying while also living in or finding your purpose. We were put here to do way more than have a baby.
Get Pregnant but take your purpose with you.—Nakeisa Jackson